【作者简介】周飞舟，北京大学中国社会与发展研究中心，孔祥瑞，北京大学教育学院

【文章来源】《社会学评论》2025年第4期

【内容提要】本文基于丧服制度对“私亲”“私尊”等问题的讨论，重新考察了“私”的含义及其在差序格局中的位置。本文发现，在儒家社会思想中，“私”并非单纯指自我，亦非纯粹的贬义，而是表示相对次要的、在与核心关系冲突时须避让的关系。与“私”相对的并非“公”，而是父子关系或同体关系。父亲是否亲之、尊之，是判断自身与其关系私与否的关键。与父母的关系、与父同体的关系是差序格局的核心与轴心，由此生发的亲尊之义、爱敬之情是推己及人的真正源头。

【关键词】私 / 一体 / 同体 / 差序格局 / 丧服

【全文链接】http://src.ruc.edu.cn/CN/Y2025/V13/I4/73

The Position of“Si”in the Differential Mode of Association

Abstract: This paper re-examines the meaning of“si”and its position in the differential mode of asscociation (chaxugeju) through a discussion of“si qin”(private kinship) and“si zun”(private respect) in mourning apparel studies. The study reveals that in Confucian social thoughts,“si”does not merely denote the self nor carry purely negative connotations. Rather, it signifies relationships of secondary importance that must yield when in conflict with core relationships. The counterpart of“si”is not“gong”(public), but rather the father-son relationship or“tongti” (corporal unity) relationship. The key criterion for determining whether a relationship is“si”lies in whether it is recognized as kin or accorded respect by the father. Relationships with parents and those sharing corporal unity with the father form the core and axis of the differential mode of association. The principles of kinship and respect, as well as the emotions of affection and reverence emanating from these relationships, constitute the true source of“extending from self to others.”